Dear Bitter Woman, Thank You.

     I saw you staring at me.  I could feel your eyes piercing my skin like a tattoo gun.  I noticed the disgusted look on your face when I said, "Hi."  I heard the sarcasm in your voice when you replied with a, "Hmm."  Believe me, I noticed; which is exactly what you wanted me to do.  You made it obvious by having a barbaric comment about my, "...expensive jeans, brown boots (that don't match the belt), and crazy hair." Yes maam, I heard you, loud and clear.  When I approached you, I noticed you trying to look away, rolling your eyes, and attempting to start a conversation with someone else-- so you didn't have to speak to me.  I also noticed you feeling like a fool, when I simply said, "Merry Christmas," and went on my way.  I noticed.  The truth is maam, you made my day.  If you were any part of my day a year ago, I would have been a mess, crying, angry, and sad.  You would have ruined my day.  We do not like to be judged or ridiculed.  Then, I learned something: you are more insecure than I could ever imagine.  When a woman degrades another woman, it is because she is intimidated by that woman.  If you are in the (ugly) shoes of being made fun of, turn and say thank you.  If you are the bitter woman, just know that...I know, you are jealous of me, intimidated, and I thank you for boosting my ego.  Whether it be the old degrading the young, the pretty degrading the prettier, the smart degrading the smarter, or the wealthy degrading the wealthier, thank you!

The New Girl

     As I welcome myself to this old, yet new-found-technology, I find myself questioning why we choose to put ourselves in vulnerable situations.  I do not like to be judged as much as the next person, yet here I am.  I have written since about the age of 12, it is my get-away, my safety blanket.  Writing is a way for me to tuck away into my own secret, pretend world, and no one knows where it is; it is magical here.  It is not about the grammar and punctuation, it is about embracing a good feeling.  So, once again, I question why I am here.  I think I am ready to share my secret world--with the world.  I have kept the most amazing secrets to life in my head; why not share them?  The secrets to life, happiness, and confidence I have; and I find it time to share them with you.  I want to share my thoughts and secrets throughout several posts; I would not want to ruin it all in one day, right?
      The term, "Chasing Rainbows," is the term I use to describe countless situations in life.  Rainbows are beautiful, symbolic, and mesmerizing; yet, you will never have one to call your own.  Regardless of what goes on inside your head, you will never catch a rainbow.  So, I question myself on this theory--is it ok to chase a rainbow, if you know you will never catch it?  In the begining, I said no.  Give up.  Do not chase things in life you will never have: a certain job, a man or woman, a pet....just give up.  Now?  I disagree.  If wherever you find happiness is impossible, so-be-it, you are happy, right?